


Yūgen

by paburke



Series: Kintsugi [4]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: But they aren't even friends yet, Gen, Marriage of Convenience, Obi-Wan Needs a Hug, Sabé does not deserve this, obi-wan gets a hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-05
Updated: 2018-10-05
Packaged: 2019-07-25 15:38:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16200518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/paburke/pseuds/paburke
Summary: Obi-Wan’s self-sacrificing nature nearly makes Sabé a widow.  Sabé had a feeling this was a habit she needed to break.





	Yūgen

-owk->bt-

Sabé was filling the children’s soup bowls when Luke screamed.  It was more than a cry of distress, which had been rare.  Ben stumbled out of her berth, where she had managed to talk him into sleeping while the rest of them began their day.  Ben shoved the infant at Kargu and muttered, “Shield him.”  Then he continued to the ‘fresher, stripping with each faltering step.

Sabé blinked and hurried to follow, but Kargu switched Luke to free up an arm and grabbed her.  “Did he do anything in the Force yesterday?  That feels like burn-out.  A bad burn-out.”

Sabé was saddened that even Jedi younglings knew so much of suffering.  “He said that he ‘immersed himself in the Unifying’ yesterday.  Does that mean anything to you?”

Mara looked confused and unhappy with the drama, still missing her parents and not understanding why she woke up in a strange place with strange people.  Kargu, Remé and Yala all looked scared.  Sabé understood it to mean that Ben had done something immensely stupid in fear of being in the Core.  “How do I help him?”

“Don’t let him drown in his own vomit and keep talking to him,” Kargu answered.  He paused before continuing softly, “Tell him we need him?  That Luke needs him?”

Sabé promised that she would.  “Could you keep an eye on the children?  And on the autopilot?  We’re in hyperspace and shouldn’t drop out until tomorrow, but someone needs to be aware.”

“Of course, Lady Sabé.” 

Sabé would work on their formality later.  Kargu was already moving Remé to sit next to Mara and Yala next to Hedese for meal help.  Sabé had a stubborn, self-sacrificing Jedi Master to keep alive.

Ben was stripped to the waist and vomiting in the toilet.  He was skin and bones, she had seen healthier captives during the Trade Blockade of Naboo.  He had a number of scars.

Then Ben started seizing.  Sabé hurried close to keep him from hitting his head and kept his airway un-obstructed.  She held his head and shoulders and counted the seconds.  After two full minutes, Ben relaxed.

“Ben,” she called.

Nothing.

“Obi-Wan?”

“Hmmm?”

“Come back,” she demanded.  “You can’t die and leave me with all this.”

“Hmm.”

“Come back for Luke, for your wife, Ben.”

“Satine?” he questioned.

Sabé wasn’t truly jealous or surprised.  After all, if she –Force forbid- had to identify her husband today while delirious, Ben wouldn’t even be mentioned and Obi-Wan was so low on the prospective list, he might as well not count.

“Luke needs you.  Leia needs you.  You have to stay alive for Padmé’s children.”

“Anakin?”

Sabé would rather that Fallen Jedi fall off a cliff and never be mentioned again, but desperate measures… “Anakin’s children need you, Obi-Wan.  Luke and Leia.  The other children need you too, Kargu, Remé and Yala and Hedese.  And Mara too.”

“Luke’s wife,” Obi-Wan whispered.  Sabé was too shocked to respond.  “Sidious would have raised her.  A horrid existence for her loyalty.  A hand.  An assassin.”

“Stay in the present, Obi-Wan,” Sabé ordered.  “We need you here, now.  You kept her out of the emperor’s hands.  You need to stay with us to keep us safe.”

“I fail,” Obi-Wan argued.

“You do not,” Sabé counted.  “You saved me on Tattooine and time and time again.  You save so many.”

“I fail, I fail,” Obi-Wan lamented.  “Oh Master Jinn, I failed Anakin.”

“You did not.”

“Oh Master Jinn, I failed you.  I’m so sorry.”

Sabe shook the stubborn man in her arms.  “Jinn made his own mistakes.”  Sabé had seen the surveillance recordings.  Jinn had separated himself from Obi-Wan, from his back-up needlessly.  Out of arrogance, perhaps?  “It’s not your fault, Obi-Wan.”

“Please forgive me, Master.”

“Obi-Wan, it’s not your fault.”

“Master.”

Sabé had to get him out of this rut.  “Obi-Wan, think of Luke, of Leia, of Mara, of Kargu, Hedese, Yala and Remé.  We need you.  You have not failed us.  You cannot give up.”

“Master,” he begged.

Yala appeared in the door.  Sabé would have ordered her out, but the girl’s focus was on the ‘fresher corner opposite Ben and Sabé.  “Uh-oh,” she whispered.  She crawled into Ben’s lap, and wrapped his limp arms around her.  “Keep talking,” she told Sabé.  “It is working.  He’s helping.”

So Sabé continued talking.  She spoke of the children, of the hound pup that would follow Ben around when it wasn’t following Remé.  She spoke of her parents and how she would have to tell them sometime soon of her marriage.  She spoke of Padmé, her dear friend and how they met and all the adventures they had before the Jedi and the Trade Federation.  She told Obi-Wan how much she missed her friend.  Obi-Wan talked back, though his conversation seemed focused on Master Jinn.

Sabé ignored the discontinuity and talked until she fell asleep, Ben warmer than a blanket in her arms.  When she woke, she was tucked into her bed.  Ben was nowhere near.  When she did find Ben, he was leading a mediation session with the children.  He was once more the unflappable, serene Jedi Master.

He was pretending that nothing had happened when he looked her in the eyes.

Sabé glared in response.  They were going to have _words_.  The Negotiator was not going to wiggle out of this one. 

He was never going to _immerse himself in the Unifying Force ever again_.

-owk->bt-

That damned man immersed himself in the Unifying Force on their very next stop.

Though the side effects were an order of magnitude less severe, it still was frightening listening to Obi-Wan beg Anakin and Master Jinn for their forgiveness.  Sabé yelled at him this time, pointing out that both men owed Obi-Wan a massive apology, rather than the other way around.  Obi-Wan didn’t believe her, but she would repeat the truth until it soaked into his soul.

-owk->bt-

**Author's Note:**

> Yūgen – A Japanese world view focusing on the acceptance of the sad beauty in human suffering, the natural cycle of growth and decay.


End file.
